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Hot Rednecks

14 June 2007 2 Comments

Call me a poor excuse for a black girl if you like, but I’m finally ready to declare my adoration of hot rednecks. Not rednecks in that string-you-up-in-a-tree-for-drinking-from-the-wrong-fountain way, but in that all-American-tousle-haired-boyish-hunk way. Here are my faves.

Paul Walker


Paul Walker is from a redneck part of California, has a baby’s momma, and grew up in a trailer home. He was in the Fast & Furious movies, She’s All That, Skulls, and other stuff. His role as Lance Harbor in Varsity Blues makes me think of my long-time real life redneck crush[REDACTED].[REDACTED if you’re reading this, the offer is on the table.

Bret Michaels

Back when my inner white girl was on the outside, Poison was my favorite band and you couldn’t tell me that the lead singer, Bret Michaels, wasn’t the hottest guy around. He’s a central Pennsylvania redneck. My parents didn’t like that I went around gushing about him all day, which is fair considering he’d eventually wind up in a sex tape with Pam Anderson and is now starring in a VH-1 Celebreality dating show. Every rose does indeed have its thorn.

Bo Duke

An original old g redneck hottie! I used to love watching him shimmy into that car through the window on the Dukes of Hazzard.
Matthew McConaughey

The grand high, piece-deresitance, redneck hottie of the millennium. Always shirtless, 420 friendly, known to help black people in movies, known to rescue people’s pets and save women from wild animals, AND is the son of a gas station owner from Texas. God Bless America.

2 Comments »

  • Ginneh said:

    Mmmm yummy!

  • bklyn6 said:

    McConaughaaaaaaay!

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