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Police Sketches of Black Dudes

26 September 2007 22 Comments

newsrapist

The photo above is no gag – as funny as it is to see that the composite sketch of the rapist looks just like the newscaster, its not as funny when you realize that police sketch artist drawings of black people are notoriously poor and rarely look like anyone in particular. I’m convinced that when asked to describe the suspect, witnesses just describe the last black male they saw, even if they last saw a black male on television. So I did a little Thembi-style experiment by going online and digging up dozens of sketches of black suspects to see just who the strong arm of the law is looking for. Of course my conclusion was that the “black male suspect” could be ANYONE or SOMEONE who obviously didn’t commit the crime. Here are just a few for now:

obamadouble
Is this a suspected child molester from the Fort Lauderdale area? Or is it Barack Obama lookin’ mad?

murphydouble
It looks like the Houston metropolitan area has been in a frenzy searching for a rapist … or Mel B’s babydaddy.

hammerdouble
This aint no Baltimore area armed robber – it’s MC Hammer during his “Pumps and a Bump” phase!

lldouble

This alleged bank robber looks so much like L.L. Cool J I don’t even know why I bothered posting the real Uncle L’s picture.

Is my point proven?

22 Comments »

  • ambboogie said:

    point proven indeed….

    you know the cops go looking for

    a black male
    between 4’11 – 6’5

    go get em’ johnson!

  • Q said:

    Dave Chappelle himself couldn’t have said this better

  • Phil said:

    Free OJ!!!!

  • justjudith said:

    great post. and yeah, you proved your point and also worked in a pumps and a bump reference. score!

  • shelbyinitalia said:

    again, you’ve gone too far

  • shelbyinitalia said:

    picture #3 could also be masta p with a l’il bit of weight on him

  • Muze said:

    this is a great post! and WHY does that bank robber look JUST LIKE LL? lol. wow. i agree, i think they just describe some tall dark man with a mustache…and send the dogs a’sniffin. shame on it all.

  • Undercover Black Man said:

    Brilliant, Thembi. Just brilliant.

  • Jippy said:

    we have to find a way to capitalize on your brilliance/mental illness so you can quit your job

  • Thembi said:

    Who you tellin’ Jippy!

  • hottnikz said:

    perp #3 looks like KRS-ONE,lol. Great post Thembi!

  • dp said:

    Thembi,
    You murdered this joint right here. Let me bring it over to DP Dot Com one time. You get all credits and links of course.

    Plus, holla at Sonny from Cocoa Puffs…
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxBI6MH-KT8

  • Thembi said:

    Go for it DP!

    I could probably actually make a monthly feature out of this and never run out of unidentified black males…

  • AJ said:

    Excellent post! I guess they don’t put anymore effort into the sketches cause we all look alike. I’m sure we could all find someone in our family that looks like all of these sketches. SMH

  • Dara said:

    THEMBI, YOURE GOING TO MAKE ME LOSE MY JOB!!!

    busted yet another gut in the office as a result of your sheer hilarity. what do people WITHOUT hilarious older siblings do with themselves? oh, read your blog, i guess.

  • blogxilla said:

    that dude who you got up next to obama looks like the Jazmin’s father off the boondocks!!! lol greeat post

  • jamie said:

    that looks nothing like obama haha!!

    that does look like ll cool j though…

  • Brandon said:

    That’s crazy! nice post.

  • Undercover Black Man said:

    Time for you to do this one again, Thembi.

  • Thembi Ford (author) said:

    I think you’re right UBM. I’m gonna get on that!

  • Luvvie said:

    THIS post is STILL awesome! 3 years later.

  • Jordanna Danztler said:

    Uncle Cleetus, is dat u? Anyways, I am new to u, Ms. Thembi, but dayum are you spot on! And sometimes, they put in even less of an effort and just whip out one “universal” sketch. Dayum shame.

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