Comments on: Michael Jackson and The Five Stages of Grief: Depression http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html Pontifications, coonery, quips, blasphemy, miscegenation, freshness, concern for celebrity life, the beauty of blackness, the sorrow of work-life, the curse of brilliance, and sassy stories. [Pop culture criticism, entertainment reviews, and humor writing by Thembi Ford.] Mon, 14 Mar 2011 15:35:05 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Aida http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-20844 Aida Thu, 22 Jul 2010 03:30:36 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-20844 I am extremely sad as time goes by. At first I was sort of numb - I was the same when my father was killed - but as time passes, the loss becomes even more apparent to me. Can't exactly put it into words. If I'm being honest - and I know many will not understand this - I am even more sad over Michael's passing than that of my father. I know the exact reason for that though - my father had lived a happy, healthy life, loved and was loved back. But Michael always felt lonely and sad, and as I listen to some of his recorded conversations with friends, or those who pretended to be friends only to later use the tapes to profit from his passing, I realize that even his music and success was in hopes of being loved - it is what he said. I won't pretend I "know" Michael based on a few recorded conversations he had, but they do give some insight into his emotions and feelings about himself. To me, though obviously troubled, Michael was one of the most normal people there is, but we live in a world where one must conform, and his choosing to remain pure at heart brought him a great deal of pain. IN his younger days, he once said he would like to meet someone special and disappear with her some place away from everyone. I wish he could have experienced that. I wish he could have experienced and allowed unconditional love into his life, someone who would have stayed with him at least long enough to make him look in the mirror and love himself with all his flaws. He made millions of people happy, yet was so sad and lonely all his life, apart from his children. I search for videos, articles, anything that would let me know that he was happy in his personal life and with himself, but the only happy videos of him I find is when he spoke of his music. Yet even that, as he explained, was in hopes of being loved. Maybe if I knew that he was finally happy with himself and loved by a special someone for all that he was , I could let go and be at peace. For now, it is difficult not to cry and feel extreme sadness every time I hear his song and the pain in his voice. I am extremely sad as time goes by. At first I was sort of numb – I was the same when my father was killed – but as time passes, the loss becomes even more apparent to me. Can’t exactly put it into words. If I’m being honest – and I know many will not understand this – I am even more sad over Michael’s passing than that of my father. I know the exact reason for that though – my father had lived a happy, healthy life, loved and was loved back. But Michael always felt lonely and sad, and as I listen to some of his recorded conversations with friends, or those who pretended to be friends only to later use the tapes to profit from his passing, I realize that even his music and success was in hopes of being loved – it is what he said. I won’t pretend I “know” Michael based on a few recorded conversations he had, but they do give some insight into his emotions and feelings about himself. To me, though obviously troubled, Michael was one of the most normal people there is, but we live in a world where one must conform, and his choosing to remain pure at heart brought him a great deal of pain. IN his younger days, he once said he would like to meet someone special and disappear with her some place away from everyone. I wish he could have experienced that. I wish he could have experienced and allowed unconditional love into his life, someone who would have stayed with him at least long enough to make him look in the mirror and love himself with all his flaws. He made millions of people happy, yet was so sad and lonely all his life, apart from his children. I search for videos, articles, anything that would let me know that he was happy in his personal life and with himself, but the only happy videos of him I find is when he spoke of his music. Yet even that, as he explained, was in hopes of being loved. Maybe if I knew that he was finally happy with himself and loved by a special someone for all that he was , I could let go and be at peace. For now, it is difficult not to cry and feel extreme sadness every time I hear his song and the pain in his voice.

]]> By: Abram Dailey http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-15136 Abram Dailey Tue, 27 Apr 2010 06:18:30 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-15136 I really miss Michael Jackson. He is truly the greatest pop singer of the century. Farewell king of pop.. I really miss Michael Jackson. He is truly the greatest pop singer of the century. Farewell king of pop..

]]> By: Simone http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-5374 Simone Thu, 05 Nov 2009 15:57:30 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-5374 I am still sad about this even after almost 5 months. And I think it's mainly because he was the only constant figure that a lot of us had from the time we were kids until now. I've been a fan since I was 5 and remained even through all of the accusations and criticisms. My mother was a Jackson 5 fan before me and influenced me to become a fan. Now my 2 and a half year old is dancing around our house in a fedora to "Smooth Criminal". I mean he broke down so many barriers, surpassed so many expectations and broke so many records, how could he not be regarded as and icon. The saddest part is because he was such an influence that now we don't have someone to take the spot. Almost everyone that has come up behind him has taken something from him. If he would have died of old age in his own bed at 90 years old, his fans would be happy that he lived a full life and hopefully had some grandchildren around him and was finally at peace. One thing we can say is that he is at peace now. Now we are the ones who have to find some peace. I am still sad about this even after almost 5 months. And I think it’s mainly because he was the only constant figure that a lot of us had from the time we were kids until now. I’ve been a fan since I was 5 and remained even through all of the accusations and criticisms. My mother was a Jackson 5 fan before me and influenced me to become a fan. Now my 2 and a half year old is dancing around our house in a fedora to “Smooth Criminal”. I mean he broke down so many barriers, surpassed so many expectations and broke so many records, how could he not be regarded as and icon. The saddest part is because he was such an influence that now we don’t have someone to take the spot. Almost everyone that has come up behind him has taken something from him. If he would have died of old age in his own bed at 90 years old, his fans would be happy that he lived a full life and hopefully had some grandchildren around him and was finally at peace. One thing we can say is that he is at peace now. Now we are the ones who have to find some peace.

]]> By: Tilde http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4747 Tilde Wed, 12 Aug 2009 18:10:47 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4747 Thanks it feels good to not be alone grieving a person you didn't know. I though I was weird or maybe I am. Thanks it feels good to not be alone grieving a person you didn’t know. I though I was weird or maybe I am.

]]> By: lola gets http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4384 lola gets Thu, 16 Jul 2009 01:42:54 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4384 I LOVED this series, Thembi! I, too, will miss MJ. I LOVED this series, Thembi! I, too, will miss MJ.

]]> By: Janet http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4350 Janet Fri, 10 Jul 2009 09:11:07 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4350 I totally agree with Mary on this one. I don't think this young generation of ours has experienced the taking of one of our icons. Michael was ours as well as the very young (my 5 year old nephew) and old (my 58 year old dad). What is a world without Michael? As long as I can remember he has been there with a new incarnation of himself wowing us every time. I feel silly, ashamed, and frightened at how much of a blow this is. We all loved Michael and we are collectively feeling the breaking of our hearts. It's the end of an era and his death marks the shift in time and events like the way we use BC and AD. He's that monumental to us. I'm thinking about being a little girl in grade school and having someone ask me my name. "Janet!" "Janice, you said?" "No,Janet. Like Janet Jackson." "Oh, do you have a brother named Michael?" :sighing: "No" I totally agree with Mary on this one. I don’t think this young generation of ours has experienced the taking of one of our icons. Michael was ours as well as the very young (my 5 year old nephew) and old (my 58 year old dad). What is a world without Michael? As long as I can remember he has been there with a new incarnation of himself wowing us every time. I feel silly, ashamed, and frightened at how much of a blow this is. We all loved Michael and we are collectively feeling the breaking of our hearts. It’s the end of an era and his death marks the shift in time and events like the way we use BC and AD. He’s that monumental to us. I’m thinking about being a little girl in grade school and having someone ask me my name.
“Janet!”
“Janice, you said?”
“No,Janet. Like Janet Jackson.”
“Oh, do you have a brother named Michael?”
:sighing: “No”

]]> By: BlackWomenBlowTheTrumpet http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4327 BlackWomenBlowTheTrumpet Wed, 08 Jul 2009 00:33:01 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4327 Hey Thembi! Gurrrrrl.... I know you were in front of the telly for the entire Michael Jackson Memorial! Did you call off of work just to see it? I know you did!! I can't wait to see your post on your impressions of it all!! Jennifer Hudson *yawn* Will someone please find her another stylist who will choose dresses for her that are flattering. She's about nine months pregnant but that dress that was above the knee was just not the best choice if she was intending to look regal... Usher *yawn* I had never heard him sing before in my life. Now that I have... well... he sings...but I didn't encounter a mega star... it's good that he has a great PR team because he will not be a legend in R&B if that is what he's going for... Magic Johnson *chuckles* Why did he give KFC a free plug when they were not paying him? Wait, we don't know that KFC didn't pay him...the tabloids will let us know in a few days! Al Sharpton *raised brow* I am not sure why Al Sharpton was chosen for the eulogy... I don't understand that at all. But apparently he was loyal to the family and so they wanted him there... My prayers go out to his family and his children for all the pain that they are feeling... Hey Thembi!

Gurrrrrl…. I know you were in front of the telly for the entire Michael Jackson Memorial! Did you call off of work just to see it? I know you did!! I can’t wait to see your post on your impressions of it all!!

Jennifer Hudson *yawn*

Will someone please find her another stylist who will choose dresses for her that are flattering. She’s about nine months pregnant but that dress that was above the knee was just not the best choice if she was intending to look regal…

Usher *yawn*

I had never heard him sing before in my life. Now that I have… well… he sings…but I didn’t encounter a mega star… it’s good that he has a great PR team because he will not be a legend in R&B if that is what he’s going for…

Magic Johnson *chuckles*

Why did he give KFC a free plug when they were not paying him? Wait, we don’t know that KFC didn’t pay him…the tabloids will let us know in a few days!

Al Sharpton *raised brow*

I am not sure why Al Sharpton was chosen for the eulogy… I don’t understand that at all. But apparently he was loyal to the family and so they wanted him there…

My prayers go out to his family and his children for all the pain that they are feeling…

]]> By: Mary http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4326 Mary Tue, 07 Jul 2009 23:11:20 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4326 I've been in such a funk since his death. In and out of teary-eyed episodes. It's been hard for me to find words to express what I'm feeling. And I'm embarrassed to be so sad about someone I don't know, especially since I know there are so many other tragedies in this world that require our attention right now. But this article really helped me, because it does put into words so much of what I've been feeling. And more importantly it lets me know that there isn't something wrong with me for feeling this way. Thank you. I’ve been in such a funk since his death. In and out of teary-eyed episodes. It’s been hard for me to find words to express what I’m feeling. And I’m embarrassed to be so sad about someone I don’t know, especially since I know there are so many other tragedies in this world that require our attention right now.

But this article really helped me, because it does put into words so much of what I’ve been feeling. And more importantly it lets me know that there isn’t something wrong with me for feeling this way. Thank you.

]]> By: Cynthia http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4325 Cynthia Tue, 07 Jul 2009 21:52:14 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4325 The memorial today had me depressed and sad.... The memorial today had me depressed and sad….

]]> By: LJS http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/2009/07/michael-jackson-and-the-five-stages-of-grief-depression.html/comment-page-1#comment-4317 LJS Mon, 06 Jul 2009 05:24:01 +0000 http://www.whatwouldthembido.com/?p=1954#comment-4317 I'm still bargaining...and sad....and just PISSED OFF! I am all the stages in one big pot of grief over MJ. Don't you have another stage to write about- I need to read it cuz I think that one is supposed to help me out a little. ; ) Thanks for your very thoughtful essays. I’m still bargaining…and sad….and just PISSED OFF! I am all the stages in one big pot of grief over MJ. Don’t you have another stage to write about- I need to read it cuz I think that one is supposed to help me out a little. ; ) Thanks for your very thoughtful essays.

]]>