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“What The Eff?” Wednesday: “Philipinas Got Talent” Presents Big Mouth

Thembi Ford 31 March 2010 4 Comments

You know those Filipino prisoner dance videos that have been floating around the internet for the past few years? I have Filipino friend who explained them by telling me that her people love to sing and dance and have true reverence for the ability to entertain. Logically speaking then, the Filipino version of the “Got Talent,” franchise should be a doozy, right? Meet BM, which stands for Big Mouth. BM actually has a big mouth and big ol’ eyes and a Big Bird inspired cape to match. I won’t label BM with a gender but s/he has a great voice and other special talents. Just watch this video to the end and be amazed.

There were a few pivotal moments in this clip. First was the flash of fear when BM started singing and makes the most godawful face ever. Then you’re like wait, did I just hear a horse? Then you notice BM do some sassy neck moves and wonder about his gender. Then you hear a horse again and you’re like oh sweet lord, this dude just sounded exactly like a horse! Then you ask yourself what language this is and why it sounds so snazzy. Then there’s more horse, some bird noises, and total confusion when the judges call his performance “breathtaking” and seem legitimately verklempt at the power of his vocal stylings and ninnying party trick. Kind of makes you feel crazy, doesn’t it?

Questions: Does “breathtaking” mean the same thing in the Philippines as it means in American English? Is BM a transvestite, transsexual, or drag queen? Did Big Bird die for this mess? Is this some traditional song about the love affair between a horse and a bird, and if not how does BM justify The Seabiscuit remix? How did BM realize that he could make that sound? Does he need to make that face to make that sound? Has he been around a real horse to see what happens¬†when he makes that sound?¬†Does he have a thyroid problem? Is he Musicorey‘s Filipino cousin, strangely enough with a way brighter future? Why is that song so catchy? Lastly, WHAT the eff?

4 Comments »

  • Blutopaz said:

    I need therapy now.

  • Tafari said:

    This is so fucked up that it is almost too hard to parse it all out. When I heard the horse noses, I initially thought it was coming from my iPod for some reason.

    The faces scared the shit out of me to the point, I was like confused as to if the talent was face contortion, animal noses or that singing. What was it???

    I won’t even address the gender bending & those hungry eyes. iCant.

    You my friend have an amazing ability to find the strangest shit online! Seriously…

  • ShonQuayShah said:

    i could not finish it…i need to go pray now. es muy dark-sided.

  • Fave said:

    I lasted six seconds. I just threw anointed oil on my monitor screen.

    The devil is a LIE.

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