What Would Thembi Do? » Hair Freaks

The Years Have Not Been Kind To Coolio

Thembi Ford — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 14:38:42 +0000

Contrary to your assertions, Coolio, life IS NOT a fantastic voyage of any sort. If you look left to right really fast doesn't it remind you of a vase of wilted flowers?

Aretha Franklin Does It Again.

Thembi Ford — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 12:39:57 +0000

I am not in the business of disrespecting legends. I swear I'm not. But Aretha Franklin is really starting to try my patience. This is a very grown black lady look - her blonde highlighted wig is tossed to the side and she is wearing it like she's got some business. As usual, her bountiful breasts are howling out less so for R-E-S-P-E-C-T and more for S-U-P-P-O-R-T. I mean, I just

Pimp With “Exquisitely Styled” Hair Sentenced to 18 Years

Thembi Ford — Fri, 21 May 2010 19:38:53 +0000

Jersey City Society Hill pimp is sentenced to 18 years in prison

Society Hill pimp Allen E. Brown got a little testy in court this morning and was sentenced to 18 years in prison by Judge Kevin Callahan in Hudson County Superior Court in Jersey City. Brown, aka Prince, was shocked at the length of the sentence. "18 years?" Brown blurted out in court when Callahan announced the sentence. "This will take you to your 60th birthday until you see the light of day" said Callahan. "The

“What The Eff?” Wednesday: Who Is Corey Johnson aka Musicorey?

Thembi Ford — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 02:36:54 +0000

People always ask me, "Thembi, how do you find this stuff?" Well, this week I'm going to walk you through the process because there is no reason why a perfectly sane woman such as myself should be asking any questions about Corey Johnson. Please bear with me as I take you through the tragically painful journey of discovering all there is to know about this person.

Black Hair Talk: White Girls With Black Haircuts

Thembi Ford — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 13:05:53 +0000

I need for white girls and fellas to stop getting blackgirl haircuts. Cease and desist. Do not pass Go or collect two hundred dollars. In the immortal words of Full House's Uncle Joey "Cut. It. Out."

Kate Gosselin, I see you. I hate that you've been abandoned by your man and are now the single mother of eight screaming kids (as much as that sounds like a stereotypical black woman's dilemma). But you're not doing yourself any favors with that characteristically complicated blackgirl haircut. Why on earth would a white woman do such a thing?

KGB “Weave” Commercial: Offensive or Corny (Poll)?

Thembi Ford — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 23:33:19 +0000

I can barely tell if this is a Public Service Announcement or a commercial, but it definitely rubs me the wrong way. Funny or foul? I find the eye-bugging, neck-rolling, finger-waving black woman thing (halfway through having a weave sewn-in, no less) extremely tired, but there's something else bugging me about this commercial and I'm not sure what.

“What The Eff?” Wednesday: The World’s Worst

Thembi Ford — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:13:02 +0000

People always call me mean because I laugh at others but the older I get the more entitled I feel to do so. It stands to reason that if what you offer sucks, you should just try harder. There are no gold stars for effort and your heart will not be blessed just because you have no idea how terrible you are at what you're doing - unless, of course, we can laugh at you while you do it. So today I'm going to give some of the World's Worst their due - no one may think you're any good but Thembi thinks you're great for a laugh so keep on keepin' on, boo. World's Worst Comedian Just when you thought VHS was dead someone digs up a video of a brother wearing a string tie and smartly-cocked red beret. Meet Darrell Bluett, whose "World of Pictures," stand up routine is an Internet sensation that you can't afford to miss.

Celebrity Status: Five Truths About Wild Weaves

Thembi Ford — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 00:54:58 +0000

I guess she epitomizes the phrase “one track mind” (pause).

“What The Eff?” Wednesday: Disturbing Strokes, Indeed

Thembi Ford — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 21:31:18 +0000

I hate the internet so very much. Seriously, I start off looking into something that is borderline scholarly and end up finding types of despair that make me realize that I have no business looking on the internet with an empty stomach. I started out at Mental Floss (a nerd site) where I discovered this tickling re-interpretation of the opening credits to Diff'rent Strokes called "Disturbing Strokes." It's entertaining to see how much different music can change the intentions of Mr. Drummond. Check it out:

Thembi Keeps It Real: I’m Addicted To “For The Love of Ray J”

Thembi Ford — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 18:51:03 +0000

Hi, my name is Thembi and I’m a VH-1 Celebreality Addict.

Every single time I try to be aware of what’s on television but not get all “involved” I fail miserably. It’s not that I don’t…