A year ago today I hadn’t thought much about what happens when you die, or even what could happen when millions of people who feel a connection to a man like Michael Jackson suddenly lose him.

In what can only be considered continued monkey business on the part of La Toya “Least Talented Jackson” Jackson, Animal Planet arranged a reunion between her and Bubbles and she was all in. Yes a reunion with Michael’s boo Bubbles The Chimp. That’s why I called it monkey business. Get it?

I need to get a few things off of my chest.

If I fainted and woke up to Michael Jackson’s doctor putting an IV into my arm I would’ve flipped out right there on that plane. I mean they’d have to call the air marshalls, TSA, CIA, FBI, FEMA, all of them. I mean for real hell no. Let me breathe into a paper bag or wave some smelling salts under my nose instead. I might start carrying smelling salts for that reason alone, and I don’t even really know what smelling salts are exactly.

I don’t usually start with something I hate, but as you’ve surely heard by now hip-hop legend Guru is having serious health issues and is in the hospital after a string of crises involving a heart attack, asthma attack, and coma. As if the unfortunate nature of these events isn’t enough, the internet is abuzz with accusations that his producer Solar (or “Superproducer Solar,” as he prefers to be called) is blocking the family’s access to Guru, didn’t even notify them that he’d been hospitalized for nearly a month before he went into a coma, and is currently making key…

People always ask me, “Thembi, how do you find this stuff?” Well, this week I’m going to walk you through the process because there is no reason why a perfectly sane woman such as myself should be asking any questions about Corey Johnson. Please bear with me as I take you through the tragically painful journey of discovering all there is to know about this person.

After my much needed hiatus I’m refreshed and re-focused…well, sort of. Since I spent the first week of the new year laying low I only absorbed all of the motivational “let get it in 2010!” talk from afar, and am rejoining the online community in a regular winter blues state of mind. It’s cold. It’s not just December on the East Coast cold, it’s freezing. I spent my time away in FLORIDA where it was only fifty degrees or so, which is way better than the negative temperatures I would have faced at home but still a huge rip off

The most significant event of 2009 can’t be anything but Michael Jackson’s shocking death. We’ve had plenty of time to get used to the fact that he’s gone and contemplate the value of his contributions to music, style, and pop culture, and Spike Lee wraps it all up for us with the video for “This Is It.” The song has been an odd one to me since it’s October release – I get the feeling that the ballad, recorded by Michael in 1983, isn’t quite ‘perfect’ enough for his infamously strict standards. That aside, Michael’s voice combined with the beautiful…

Lawrence and Jackson, that is.  I’m still trying to make sense of Michael Jackson’s four brothers and their new reality show and in doing so have fantasized about the thrashing that Jermaine would receive in a just world. I don’t mean those old school Joe Jackson beatings, I’m hoping for something supplemental to punish him for recent offenses. Anyway all of this made me think of one of the funnier gags on Martin. Check it out (and disable the annotations)…

Loyal reader Miriam posted a link to the Huffington Post article about Sammy Sosa’s drastic skin color change, and added the note: “As far as I’m concerned, this is a Thembi-mergency.” Miriam, I am on the case.

This is Sammy Sosa. For those of you who don’t know, he’s considered one of the greatest baseball players ever. He’s of Dominican descent and his home run hitting ability was a source of pride for Latinos until he was accused of using performance-enhancing drugs and corking his bat in 2003. Sosa retired earlier this year, and since then seems to be passing the time gettin’ purty. That’s Sammy in May on the left, and

The WWTD Dinner and a Movie Event was so much fun that I’ll definitely have more in the future – the people who read this blog are fun and cool with sick senses of humor and an appreciation good times, so I want to thank everyone who came out! The real star of the event, of course, was Michael Jackson.